One Month Home

I dont know if it was right or wrong...but I totally prepared myself for the worst when thinking of Aven's adjustment into our family. I expected to be getting little sleep, helping her adjust to a new bed and a new time zone, fighting for her affection, facing rejection, and be just flat-out exhausted from adding another child to our family. None of those things have happened. She attached to me and treated me like her mommy from day 2 in Ethiopia. She never once was angry or rejected me. She was scared, but looked to me for comfort. And that fear left quickly! She has slept 12-13 hours since her first night at home. She is eating like a champ as well! It took her a couple of weeks to warm up to Brian she knows he is "daddy" now! We have found that she takes to other people much better when I am not around. If I am there, she only wants me. We have left her with my mom for a few hours a couple of times and Aven did great!

Brody and Levi are still completely smitten. They adore her! Aven adores them too, but Levi definitely gets on her nerves:) He has not figured out how to give her any space. In the mornings and after naptime Levi cannot wait to go get her from her bed. The minute she even makes a peep, he says "Mommy! Aven is talling (calling) for me! She's trying (crying) for me! Aven want me! I go get her, mommy!" He is relentless and will not let me wait even a minute to go get her:) I am pretty sure if she wanted anyone to come get her, it would NOT be him. They are working on their relationship. If its possible for him to love her TOO much, he does!

 She has adjusted so well. The transition has been so much easier than I thought it would be. Mainly because her and Levi are so close in age and she came into our home on pretty much the same schedule as him for eating and napping. Its been SO good. We are so thankful for the grace the Lord has given us in this transition for our family!

Christmas '12

I could not have been more happy to have my entire family all under one roof for Christmas! We went to the Christmas Eve service at our church and brought the whole family including my parents and my grandma. It was Aven's first time at church and it was very emotional for me! I had sat in those same seats for months praying to and praising the Lord during our wait. The Lord has used this journey to make me more like Him and for that I am SO thankful. It was a painful process that the Lord used to mold and shape me. Now we sat as a WHOLE family on the eve of Christmas. Aven was hearing people worship for the first time--- a chance she may have never had if we had not been obedient to the Lord's calling. Brian and I got to hold her in our arms in front of the congregation and light the advent candles and read about the hope we have in Christ. It was such a special time....even if she was trying to grab the microphone:). For the first time in months, my family felt complete. The waiting was hard. But the hardest times for me, was when we would be out at large gatherings or meeting new people. There were so many times I wanted to ask if anyone else realized that my whole family was not together....that we had a daughter in Africa...does anyone notice but me?! There were so many times I felt lost. I guess it was just a feeling like things were not as they should be. But that was not the case this Christmas. I stood and worshipped with my whole family....the way it was supposed to be! It was such a sweet time! God is so good!

We let the boys sleep in the same bed Christmas night...which I am sure will be a tradition from here on out! They both woke up super early and excited of course! We decided to let Aven sleep and enjoyed watching the boys open presents play with their new things. Aven was still in the "I only want to be held" stage, so by letting her sleep I was able to help the boys with all of their new toys:) Once she woke up, the boys enjoyed helping her open her presents and showing her all of her new things!

About 2 hours after the boys woke up, both of their eyes started looking suspiciously pink!  Yep, pink eye...on Christmas morning. We let them enjoy their presents until lunchtime, when we took them to an open urgent care and found out they did have pink eye and ear infections. We were supposed to be going to Virginia to visit Brian's family that day, so we held off for 24 hours to give the antibiotics time to kick in.

We spent our first night away from home with Aven in Virginia and she did great! She did way better than I thought she would. She got to meet some of Brian's family that had not had the chance to yet. And she even got down on the floor and played with her cousins some! The boys absolutely adore their cousins and always look forward to being with them....I am sure Aven will feel the same way:)

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year from our WHOLE family to yours!

Homecoming

Its hard to believe we have only been home one week. Its been a LONG week. In a good way:) Last Saturday we brought Aven home and she is now part of her forever family! She did great on the 18 hour plane ride (supposed to be 17 but we spent an hour on the runway...lovely). She slept probably 12-13 hours of it.....We cant really ask for much better than that. There were some moments I wanted to cry....when she was crying and it was impossible to entertain an almost 1 year old in a 2ft by 2ft space. We did get a bulkhead seat with a bassinet for her to sleep on. SO thankful for that! Aven got us alot of attention and alot of perks while traveling with her. We got to skip to the front of 3 security lines and even got into the first class lounge while we waited to board our flight. Not bad.

We had a 4 hour layover in DC. We set up camp in a quiet corner and let Aven play, eat, and change clothes while we wait for our short flight home. We finally made it to RDU around 1:30 after 23 hours of travel. Aven was a trooper! We were greeted by some dear friends and family! The boys didnt even let us get off the escalator before they were running down the hallway to greet us. They set off the alarms and voices came over the intercom telling them to STOP! It was quite chaotic, but so sweet. They would not let their sister out of their sight. Every time I would try to stand up, Levi would pull on my leg and tell me to sit back on the floor so he could see his sister. Our dear friend Courtney of Always Autumn Studios took pictures at the airport for us! We are so blessed to have these moments captured!

 

  

Our first week at home has been better than I thought. Aven is extremely attached to me, which I am SO thankful for. Brian is slowly winning her over. And she loves the boys as long as they keep their distance. She doesn't love the fact that Levi wants to be in her face all of the time, but she lets him know when he is too close! She is sleeping like a champ! 12 hours at night without a peep and 2 long naps during the day. I am not sure how that all happened....she never even took time to get used to the time difference. She jumped right on a schedule the day she came home. Pretty shocking! But I will take it:) I woke up sick the morning we got home, so between adding another child to the family, jet lag and being sick, I have been extremely thankful for sleep! Aven is not thilled about strangers. She doesn't like anyone but Brian and I to touch her or hardly talk to her.  She's already getting better with that though, and I keep reminding myself that just a week and a half ago she was taken away from everything she has ever known. We could not be more thankful that Aven is home for Christmas! Praising the Lord for this 14 month journey where he taught us so much!

Ethiopia Day 3- Last Day

Aven slept good again last night....although getting her to go to sleep was a challenge. We have already found out that she really fights sleep:) But once she's asleep there is not much that wakes her! I could not keep my eyes open any longer, so Brian made it his mission to get her to sleep last night. She slept all night again with one bottle at 12:30.  She was pretty fussy for the majority of the morning, but once she got a nap in her she was ready to play and have fun with us again!

We went shopping around lunch time and she was a perfect angel! She got to Facetime with her Nonna and PopPop and she was really hamming it up! Talking, laughing, and making all sorts of funny noises:) We have been spending the afternoon/evening getting ready for our flight home. Aven's passport and visa were dropped off today so she is ready to go to America! We will eat a quick dinner and then head to the airport! I cannot wait to be home with all five of my family under one roof! 24 hours of travel.....ready or not here we come!

Ethiopia Day 2- Embassy Day

Aven slept like a champ her first night...I however did not! I was wide awake for 4 hours in the middle of the night. Somehow I didn't mind though. My daughter was right next to me. I had no problem just watching her sleep:) Maybe that's why I couldn't go back to sleep.  This morning we woke up to a different girl. Yesterday she was sad and scared. Today she was comfortable with us and we played on the floor for most of the day. I had some sweet time with just her while Brian went out to get some things straight for our flight home. She took a great nap and then it was off the Embassy for our appointment! While we were sitting in the US Embassy waiting, we got our first smile and giggle out of her! I almost broke down crying right there on the spot! We played peek-a-boo with her blanket over and over again and each time she giggled I had to hold back the tears. As much as I don't want to relive yesterday, I would love to be able to show you how scared she was.  What a different child she was today!

After the many weeks we waited to be cleared by the US Embassy to bring Aven home, all it took was less than a minute at a window and we were cleared to bring her back to the US. We will get her passport and visa tomorrow, and then be on our way tomorrow night!

Brian got lots of giggles out of Aven this afternoon! She was having so much fun with her daddy! So thankful!

Ethiopia Day 1- "Gotcha Day" (12-12-12)

On Tuesday morning we left RDU airport at 6:00 a.m. and flew to DC for our 10:15 a.m. flight to Ethiopia! Our flight landed in ET at 7:30 a.m. Ethiopian time. We got all of about 2 hours of sleep on the plane and hit the ground running when we got there.

It was so much different this time. I don't like the unknown and going into situations where I don't know what to expect. So our last trip to Ethiopia was a little scary for me. But by the end of our week there in August, I had completely fallen in love with our daughter's country and the people that live there. When we got off of the plane this time, I could help but smile. I was SO happy to be there. I couldn't wait to smell the dusty air, ride on the bumpy streets, and see all of the people that I had met on our last trip.We unloaded our things at the guest house and quickly jumped back in the van to go get Aven (with a quick stop to buy some fruit and a goat for the children at the care center on our way).

I knew the way to the care center and as we got closer, I couldn't wipe the smile off of my face. This was it. Finally. What we had been waiting for for so long. Then we pulled onto the street where the care center was and I saw the gate....I couldn't wait to see that gate! Behind it was the home where my daughter had spent practically her entire life!  When we arrived, Aven was playing on the floor with her nanny Aberesh and immediately clung to her, like she was afraid we were taking her away right then and there. We sat on the floor and played with her for quite awhile and she gradually became more comfortable with us. We stayed at the care center for 3 hours, visited the other children, and took pictures for the other families. Aberesh had bought Aven the most beautiful Ethiopian dress. She clutched in to her chest when she was about to put it on her, and said "My Tutu"(Tutu is Aven's Ethiopian name) with the biggest smile on her face.

I had always known that Aberesh and Aven shared a special bond, but that confirmed it. I know for a fact the nannies themselves rarely buy anything for the children. We had made a book for Aberesh with pictures of her and Aven together and with Bible verses on the pages written in her language. She and Aven sat on the floor looking at it together. It was such a sweet moment.

Saying goodbye was so hard. Aven took it harder than I thought. She cried....actually she shrieks, she doesn't cry. So much pain and joy happening at one time.  It was one of those difficult times as a parent, where you know you are doing what is best for your child but they don't understand. Aven doesnt know that she deserves SO much more than a nannies love. She deserves a family, with a mommy and daddy type of love.

Aven fell asleep on my lap on the way back to the guest house. And then I held her most of the afternoon. Thankfully she wanted to be held. She cried whenever I tried to put her down...and every once in awhile she would look up at me and start her little shriek. She was scared. But with each minute that went by, she became more comfortable. We took a long nap together and I enjoyed lots of snuggles.

Before bed, she enjoyed a bath. I let her stay in there as long as she wanted to....she even started to play a little bit. She went to bed so sweetly and made the cutest little noises while she was falling asleep. I was curious what the night would hold. She had hardly ever left the care center, much less slept anywhere else. But she slept 12 hours! She woke up one time, drank a bottle and went right back to sleep. And she woke up a happy and very different little girl! More to come on Day 2.....

The Fight

It is always interesting to me when adoptive parents say that they "fought" to get their children home. I never really understood what they meant. I always pictured the "fight" being a court room battle, attorneys, and goverment officials trying to keep you from your child. Sometimes that does happen. But most of the people that I have heard say that, havent had anything too dramatic happen....its just been your typical adoption (let me say that NO adoption is EASY!) 

However, NOW I know that every parent that adopts, FIGHTS. I have been fighting now for 4 months....and the past 10 weeks have been TOUGH. The fight I am referring to, does not happen in a court room or with attorneys. The fight I have been fighting has been within myself. 

It's been a FIGHT....

To live without my daughter

To live each day to its fullest 

To constantly trust the Lord

To not live in sadness

To give the Lord control

To sit back and let the Lord work

To not worry about my daughter

To not let the tears flow when someone asks me about her

To not let the circumstances consume me

To not be jealous of others

To ENJOY life

It's been a struggle. But I am SO thankful for the struggle. The Lord has taught me so much. I have learned so much about the Lord's faithfulness. I have learned to trust the Lord when everything is out of my control. I have learned to trust the Lord with my children...even when they are a world away. 

I. am. thankful. for. the. stuggle. 

And yes, that's much easier to say now that I know my daughter is coming home. But I told several people that I was thankful even last week.... when I had no idea when I would see my daughter again.

And now....NOW she is coming home.